Taylor Grey Photography

One of my all-time fave photographers, Amy Wenzel, has hooked up with I Heart Faces to give away a spot to her photography workshop…and I’ll admit the moment I saw this my heart starting beating faster and my mind started racing…I mean what if I actually won!!??? I can honestly say that being lucky is NOT one of the ways I would normally describe myself.. “Sorry Try Again” has been in just about every one of MY candy wrappers…what gives? Normally I would talk myself out of anything like this and immediately walk away from my computer, but this time I didn’t.

Then I realized entering the contest also meant writing about how I’ve been an inspiration and how I love & serve others in my life and I literally FROZE up. Figuring out the answer to those questions has been my entire focus this past year! I immediately felt drawn to enter…to tell my story…to put myself out there…to allow myself to fail…and then I drew a major blank. What do I say?! I wouldn’t really describe myself as extraordinary. My journey has had its ups and downs just like anyone else and I am not really a fan of tooting my own horn, but rules are rules people.

As I sat to write this, I thought about all the times that I have NOT made a difference…have NOT been supportive & loving and have NOT served others in my life…it is really hard to be that honest with yourself. Sure, I have been there for people…been a good sister….a decent friend…wife & mother…but couldn’t I have done more? Maybe growing up in a dysfunctional world has made me too hard on myself, but this past year has given me a whole new perspective on how to be the person I am meant to be…to go on the journey GOD has in store for me, and to touch the lives I am meant to touch.

One year ago, I had plans, I was going to make something of myself even if it meant some major things in my life fell by the wayside…then GOD stepped in. All in one year, I was completely surprised by baby #3…losing 2 grandfathers…and then devastated when at my 9th month of pregnancy my grandmother was put in ICU 1000 miles away and I couldn’t be there as she passed. Although our outlooks on life were very different…I was the yin to her yang…she and I were beyond connected. When she was gone I felt like a part of me was gone too. As the months passed, I pulled the covers over my head and tried to put my life on hold. It didn’t work. Eventually I had to let go of so much that I had been holding onto. Life is way too short to go on thinking I could control every part of my world…I had to hand it all over to GOD and really put myself out there….which to me was the scariest thing I could do.

The way I am making a difference is not really as outward as it has been inward. In the process I have been able to be a better friend…a much better sister…a more loving wife and a more patient and playful mother. This workshop would be an amazing way to re-invigorate my passion for photography, learn more about how to live my life out-loud….and how to use my passion to see more of the little things that I’ve been missing….when its all said and done those things are all that matter anyway.